Tonight my brother Tom Young, our friends Justin Morris, Jon Knudson, Steve Schaben, Kevin Campbell, and Kyle Van Osdol played and I sang at the Oklahoma City Museum of Art for their AWESOME Thursday night event, Cocktails on the Skyline. We were actually inside instead of on the roof because of the weather, but I didn't mind. The acoustics in the space made me feel like the music enveloped us and it sounded great! During the show, something happened that I have never experienced. We've played at the Museum once before. The difference tonight was that I felt calm and confident. Usually, before any kind of performance or speaking I am a bundle of nerves, but not tonight.
Don't get me wrong. I had my freak outs over the past few weeks of rehearsals. I worried, stressed, feared, panicked, and probably drove some of the band members, my friends and family a little crazy in the process. But earlier this week, I decided that I needed to finally quit letting fear rule me. I wanted to fully experience all of the fun that comes along with making music with these men. They are incredible people and musicians and I am lucky to have the opportunity to create with them. So I did it! For the first time in my whole life, I let go while performing music in front of other people. I sang out, I quit worrying about every little detail, I improvised and felt my confidence increasing by the minute. By the end of the show, the energy that flowed through the band and audience was electric!
I think letting go is a thematic recurrence in my life. Whether it's people that I love or things that aren't good for me, the more that I learn to release, the more I seem to gain and the better my life seems to be.
Thanks to my brother Tom, Steve, Kevin, Justin, Jon, Kyle and James for the encouragement to try things I'm afraid of and to push myself. I imagine these lessons will be quite important in the very near future (and for the rest of my life.)